Apr 3, 2018
What do others say when they are drinking or not drinking around us?
How did Jolene and Aidan navigate other people's opinions early on? People will certainly have conversations and opinions, but the fear of what others will think and say is often worse than what's actually said.
Some people can be threatened or feel strongly that drinking is a part of life that shouldn't be missed. Taking alcohol out can feel punitive, perfectionistic and unnecessary for many people.
However, the stronger you get in your own stance and the decision to not drink the easier this all becomes. If you feel confident and carry that energy into your interactions and social life, Jolene has found her friends have stayed her friends regardless of whether she drinks or not. Some people have even pulled her aside and said they're thinking about cutting back or taking a break from drinking themselves.
Arm yourself with an explanation of why you're not drinking. It can be quick and simple. Also, ask yourself how much you're seeking and needing permission from others to do or not do something? Some people will prefer for you to keep drinking, and there can be mild to moderate pushback, but opinions are just opinions. Let people reveal themselves, they might surprise you with their support.
The judgment goes both ways, we can also judge those who drink too much as well. Self-awareness and critical thinking is the key. Is there something sideways or off with a relationship in the first place to elicit comments or could the person who is judging be drinking too much themselves?
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